… or is it?

Clearly a part of me disagreed! We really don’t know what we don’t know about ourselves until we do the inner work to find out. 

Linda Anderson, video - Is It Safe For Me To Receive

Prefer to read? Please scroll down for the transcript.

How about you?

If hearing my story triggers any relevant memories for you, do share in the comments below, we’d love to hear your stories too.

Such memories are fertile ground for healing and for reframing some of the mistaken meanings from an older, wiser perspective, so you can show up in the world fearlessly as Who You Really Are.

If you’d like some help identifying your stories and the mistaken meanings that often go with them, go here to request one of the limited number of free Discovery Sessions that I offer each month and let’s do some exploring together.

It’s a completely free, no-obligation session – and you have nothing to lose but your blocks.

Transcript

I’m 8 years old, soon to be 9, and we haven’t seen Granny and Grandad in such a long time. They’ve come to visit us in the genteel market town we moved to a year ago, just an hour’s train ride away, but could be a million miles from the sooty mining village we had left and that they still call home.

In the afternoon, to give Mum a break with the baby, they take me out to explore the centre of what to them was an exotically prosperous town.

As we pass the bike shop, Grandad stops and points out a beautiful bright red bike with 3 gears and, wonder of wonders, a wicker basket on the front.

He looks at me sideways and says ‘Would you like a bike like that for your birthday, Linda?’

I am speechless. I can hardly believe my ears! Oh joy! If this happens, it will be my first proper ‘big girl’s bike’. With 3 gears! And a basket on the front!

When I get over the shock I nod my head furiously and squeal with excitement, “You bet I’d like a bike like that, Grandad! That would be amazing!” – whilst hardly daring to believe that such a miracle could ever come my way.

The Price of Receiving

At teatime we’re all in the kitchen when Grandad breaks the news to Mum.

She is not happy. She’s shouting and wagging her finger at me, giving me a good telling-off for daring to ask for such an expensive gift.

Then it’s Grandad’s turn to shout at Mum, and now there’s Mum, crying at the sink.

I walk over to try and comfort her, my insides churning, fear and shame tussling with each other in my belly.

This is awful! And all because I said ‘Yes’ to something totally unexpected, that I had never imagined having, something that was actually beyond my wildest dreams – and that I really really wanted.

Eventually the shouting and crying subside as explanations and apologies are offered, but I’m left with this lingering sense of shame and confusion.

What does it all mean?

(One of the most revealing questions to ask yourself about memories that remain vivid even years later)

Here are the mistaken meanings that were created in my 8-year old, soon-to-be 9-year old, brain during those few terrifyingly turbulent moments in the kitchen:

  • It’s not safe for me to want things
  • It’s selfish and unacceptable to ask for what I want
  • Other people get angry (or hurt) if I ask for and get what I want
  • It’s not safe to experience the joy of receiving good things, especially when they arrive unexpectedly
  • Good things that come my way can only mean trouble

And a part of me had been on guard ever since that day to make sure I never caused such a ruckus again with my selfish wants and desires.

Did this restrict my openness to receiving, especially when it came to receiving the unexpected?

And did it affect how I showed up in my adult life and in my business?

Push vs flow

Absolutely it did. A part of me was frozen in a very narrow tunnel, focussing on the few things I believed I could control, desperately trying to ‘make’ things happen and constantly afraid that they wouldn’t work out.

All of which was exhausting and cut me off from the flow of abundance and from any chance of receiving the unexpected because, well, I just wasn’t open to it, the door was firmly shut and there was nobody home!

And how about you?

Are you completely open and ready to receive the unexpected and all the good the Universe has in store for you? Or might there be a part of you that’s been ‘on guard’, fearing that good things may bring unintended consequences?

We really don’t know what we don’t know about ourselves until we do the inner work to find out, so here are just a few of the common signs you might secretly be blocking the flow of abundance into your life:

  • Feelings of guilt when you receive a gift – saying ‘Oh you shouldn’t have’ to the giver, rather than graciously thanking them and allowing them the pleasure of giving to you
  • Ditto when it comes to receiving compliments – brushing them off with reasons why they’re not warranted, ‘Oh this old thing, I’ve had it for years!’
  • Manifesting a big, unexpected expense just when you seem to be getting ahead financially
  • Having a glass ceiling on your income that you can’t seem to break through
  • Compulsively spending or giving money away to keep the numbers in your bank account at a level that somehow feels safe and comfortable

If hearing my story triggers any relevant memories for you, do share in the comments below, we’d love to hear your stories too.

Did you find this helpful?

Such memories are fertile ground for healing and for reframing some of the mistaken meanings from an older, wiser perspective, so you can show up in the world fearlessly as Who You Really Are.

If you’d like some help identifying your stories and the mistaken meanings that often go with them, go here to request one of the limited number of free Discovery Sessions that I offer each month and let’s do some exploring together.

It’s a completely free, no-obligation session – and you have nothing to lose but your blocks.

 

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