And other self-doubts
I hear this a lot from clients launching new programmes or a high ticket package for the first time.
I’ve had the same self-doubt myself on occasion (who hasn’t?) and expect to again. For me it’s a sure sign I’m on a path to growth.
And there’s a lot of accompanying anxiety:
Seriously, what if I don’t deliver?
What will they say about me?
Will they think I’m a fraud?
Will it mean I’m not good enough?
What if they think I’m useless?
And so on – add your own versions to the list!
But what do you mean by results?
When you launch something new there are no guarantees.
And here’s the thing about results – there’s more than one kind.
1. The results your clients are hoping for
They’re in pain of some kind and dream of being pain free
2. The results you want for them
And know they will get if they engage with your process and do the work between sessions 😉
3. The results they eventually get
Which may or may not match your expectations – and could far exceed their own. They will also likely be in proportion to where your client actually started from.
It’s a thorny issue where personal self-worth and professional competence are deeply entangled, so it makes a great target for tapping and clearing on my Big Leap to Success Programme.
Awareness of entanglement is the first step towards that.
Try this to start disentangling
Imagine you’ve hired a personal trainer and set a goal to be super-fit in 6 weeks.
He or she prescribes exercises to give you the results you want, based on their professional assessment of your fitness and health. They give you guidance in sessions and homework to do between-times.
But they can’t do the homework for you. They can’t do the push-ups for you. That’s up to you.
Do you do the exercises religiously? Some days, maybe – other days, not.
At the end of the programme, if you haven’t given it your all and you’re not exactly where you wanted to be, will you blame your personal trainer? We hope not.
Your clients’ results are none of your business
People know how much effort they’ve put in. They know when they haven’t been doing enough. They can see where they could have done more, if life hadn’t got in the way.
So what if you could get yourself out of the way, release your attachment to specific results and trust that the results they get are just perfect for them?
What if you could rest in the knowledge that provided you show up with all your genius and with complete integrity, you can safely leave the rest with them? They are adults.
And besides, if you take responsibility for their ‘failures’ you must also take responsibility for their success.
If you’re still feeling responsible, tap on your collarbone point and take a deep breath before reading on because …
Relax. It’s not about you anyway!
I know it’s great to see clients get results – that’s what motivates you to do this work because you really want to make a difference – I get that.
But continue to tie your sense of self-worth to your clients’ results, continue to believe you’re responsible for those results, and self-doubt will hold you back from boldly launching your offerings. And you’ll struggle to get the clients you need to sustain you.
We don’t want that!
Now over to you
What do you think?
Do you agree with me that your clients’ results are none of your business (provided you’ve been showing up 100% for them, of course)?
Join the conversation here, share your own tips and inspirations below.
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